String s = null;

if (貴殿==童貞||貴殿==無職) {
　s = "ｼﾞｪﾛﾆﾓｰヽ(´ー｀)ノｼﾞｪﾛﾆﾓｰ";
} else {
  s = "帰れ(`Д´)"; 
}

System.out.println(s);